Purls of Hope

I'm am here now. If you remember I had been talking about getting away from blogger. See ya there! And thanks for the break!

It is much better to keep your own house than to help keep anothers.
No matter what others think or say of me, I can go to sleep at night comfortable with myself.
I think I use this blog as anger management more than a knitting blog.

So I thought I would let you know...that I have my own "housecleaning" to tend to and will be absent for a bit.

Have a great rest of March and I'll see you in April.

Oh, and the stash buyers, I will be following up today. Sorry for the delay.

You Have a Choleric Temperament

You are a person of great enthusiasm - easily excited by many things. Unsatisfied by the ordinary, you are reaching for an epic, extraordinary life. You want the best. The best life. The best love. The best reputation. You posses a sharp and keen intellect. Your mind is your primary weapon. Strong willed, nothing can keep you down. Your energy can break down any wall. You're an instantly passionate person - and this passion gives you an intoxicating power over others. At your worst, you are a narcissist. Full of yourself and even proud of your faults. Stubborn and opinionated, you know what you think is right. End of discussion. A bit of a misanthrope, you often see others as weak, ignorant, and inferior.

This is the deal...
While I will not take the post down, I am sorry that I have to resort to commenting in this way on a very unfortunate situation.
I would like to point out that I did not get very much sleep last night...don't worry, not because of these situations, but rather that I stayed out much too late last night and was awoken much too early this morning by Mr. Clean. I and everyone around me is surviving and I am heading to bed.
I have come to the realization that I won't see those Girl Scout Cookies that I paid for... but it's okay because things come back 10 fold. I also realize when I want the Girl Scout Cookies that I paid for and don't get them when I am severely sleep deprived, I am a tad bit on edge.
I also came to the following conclusions:
1. I seem to lose my cool when someone accuses me of not being a good friend.
2. I seem to lose my cool more when someone attacks one of my friends.
3. People who steal disgust me.
4. Maybe in some areas, I really don't have a conscience.
5. Stepping back from a situation sure brings a lot of clarity to it.
6. I love my husband and though no marriage is perfect, we are able to work through things.
7. I am extremely grateful for the "true friends" in my life... you know the ones that aren't afraid to hold me accountable(because I would do the same for them)
8. I love my kids soooo much and work very hard to teach them the right things.

If you are someone that I may have offended unintentionally, I really am sorry. And I will make every effort to get enough sleep before running my fingers on a keyboard again!

Let's start with the birdhouse auction. Wow, GREAT. I am extending the donation period to next week. I am sorry I haven't gotten back to some of you, yet. Things have been super busy.

Next is the situation I have been rambling on about:
Lori has set up her blog to be a "bashing blog" which I think is funny because she had moderated comments. Please note...no moderated comments here...

Here's how the story goes...
Lori in blue
Paige in purple
Me in RED
Below is a comment left by Paige (Kevin's Girlfriend) on a thirdparty's blog. I have inserted my responses and questions to what Paige has said.

Paige said...Okay now it is my turnChristine,In Kevin's defense, he tried to go back to Ct and make things work, he did not speak to me for more than a month, and then only to say hi.
Lori's reply:
Wow, a whole month of not talking to you? If a marriage already has problems and you throw a girlfriend waiting in the wings what makes you think not talking for month is going to make a difference. And, you knew at that point that Kevin was married, what gave you the right to continue contact with a married man even if it was to just say hi?
Some people can get past some things and remain friends. Saying Hi isn't a sin.

Only when he realized that things there would not work did he and I start to talk. It was more than a year before we saw each other. I admit I only know Kevin's side of the story and what he has told me, but for my part, I do not live my life in the past, I live in the now, learn from the past and pray for the future.
The whole time he was carrying on with you he was telling me and his children that he loved us and wanted to be with us and wanted to be a family. Tell me, why was he telling us for almost 3 years that he loved us and wanted to be with us if he knew shortly after he had come home that it would not work? What he did was deceitful. If you took a test for school and got a 90% and were told you could retake it to try and get a better grade how hard would you really work at it? You probably wouldn't work at it at all, afterall, you already have a 90% waiting for you should you fail so why bother.
Is this why you don't bother to clean your house, or get a job, etc?

I don't have any regrets except for wasted time.
My daughters have a lot of regrets over wasted time. All of the time Kevin has been spending with you was time he could have been spending with his daughters. You say further on in this post that I made him miserable than why didn't he just spend time alone with the girls? He didn't want to. He made every excuse in the book to not have to have any responsibility for the girls. When Cas was getting up early in the morning for school he would deliberately leave the house just before she got up so he would not have to help or spend time with her. Instead of her taking the bus to school he could have dropped her off on his way to work and this would have given him some alone time with her so he could build a relationship with her.
You have made it impossible to spend time with the girls and make it acceptable for them to say nasty things to him. How do I know, I have been there when it has happened.

I KNOW Kevin loves his girls and is trying to do what's best for them.
Really, from the two times that reports have been filed with Social Services regarding Kevin's abuse behavior , not to mention all the times they weren't called, you'd never know it. And, what did Kevin do to try and make things right for them? NOTHING!!! They're still in therapy and probably will be for a very long time.Unfortunately they have been made to believe he is the only one to do wrong in this.No one has made the girls believe he is the only one to do wrong in this. Kevin's behavior and attitude have shown the girls how he truely feels and they have come to their own conclusions.
Isn't it mental abuse to teach your children that it is okay for them to HATE their father?

I don't believe they have ever met the Kevin I know, the one who smiles and laughs. They only one they know the one Lori has made miserable.
No one can make you miserable only you can make yourself miserable. Kevin had full control over his life and yet chose to be manipulative, deceitful and vengeful. Nobody forced him to come home after he got out of the Army. He was actually told if he really didn't want to come home to just not come home. And, no one ever threatened him with never seeing his kids again no matter what he thinks. Again I say, why didn't he make the time to spend alone with them? Because in his words he could handle one or two at a time but didn't want to be with them all at the same time. These are his children, he knew how babies were made, if he didn't want them he shouldn't have had them.
That's funny, nobody FORCED you to stay married to him.

As far as the comments about me not wanting him to have a relationship with the girls, nothing could be farther from the truth. I hope one day he can have a great relationship and I can too.

How about what the girls want? They wanted a truthful, loving father who gave 100% to try and make his marriage to their mother, who gave 110%, work. Maybe if Kevin had been open and honest from the beginning of all of this the girls wouldn't have so much mistrust and anger toward Kevin. He was the one who continually lied to them that he wanted to be with them and be a family knowing all the while that he really wanted to be with you. Then when they finally realized that he wasn't sticking around why did he continually have to tell them how bad they were and compare them to your son. My daughters are all very intelligent and insightful children. They know a two faced liar when they see one.
Your integrity is in question here, because you are not exactly truthful or loving.

I would have loved to have met them when I was in New York, but they did not want to and so Kevin and I respected that.How would Kevin know what the girls wanted, he never told them he would be spending their Christmas vacation with out them but with you or even asked them if they wanted to meet you and the son he tells them is their brother. The last they heard from him was on Christmas Eve and then he was gone. When he didn't come home for over a week what were they supposed to be told? I have said many times before that I will not lie to my children. Lies are always found out in the end and it only leads to mistrust. I will not put that burden on my relationship with them.

Okay so I opened it up now everyone can bash me, I have a blog site, but haven't had time to set it up. Thanks for letting me say what I had to say here.
As you can see, I did not bash you as so many have bashed me. I simply have stated the facts that you say you know. I have been with Kevin for almost 20 years, I dont' think you will ever truely know everything no matter what Kevin tells you.
NOBODY HAS BASHED YOU. It is your twisted paranoia. You have, however, bashed Paige...Please check the comments of your husband's blog...remember you called her a tramp. Your issues should be with Kevin, not Paige. And she had a right to defend herself.


And finally a comment left on her blog, that she surprisingly hasn't deleted, yet.
islagiatt said...
I find this interesting, quoting you: No one can make you miserable only you can make yourself miserable. That is a truly profound statement. It might be worth spending some time meditating on that statement and how it pertains to your own situation. Negative energy attracts negativity and repels positive energy. I heard something on the radio today, thanks to Dr. Joy Browne: "if you find yourself in Hell, don't stop! Keep moving and get out of there" No one can get you out of your current situation but you. Venting might feel good in the short run, but ultimately does no one any good if dwelled upon. Unfortunately, e-mail cannot convey tone of voice, so I pray that you can see that I am only trying to give a bit of neutral perspective on what seems like a miserable situation for all involved.

I WANT MY GIRLSCOUT COOKIES!!!!!

The Knitter's Handy Book of Patterns by Ann Budd
The Knitter's Handy Book of Sweater Patterns by Ann Budd
Knit Baby Blankets! by Gwen Steege
Knitter's Stash
Weekend Knitting

Make me an offer!

friend ( P ) Pronunciation Key (frnd)n.
A person whom one knows, likes, and trusts.
A person whom one knows; an acquaintance.
A person with whom one is allied in a struggle or cause; a comrade.
One who supports, sympathizes with, or patronizes a group, cause, or movement: friends of the clean air movement.
Friend A member of the Society of Friends; a Quaker.

That's funny. Do you see anything in there about a friend having to agree?

And to Laura... yes the charity does know about the bad parts of me... see that's what makes them love me more. You see, what I learned in that group home was: It's okay to not be perfect, but you must learn to grow as a person. Now both of you have taken up too much of my very valuable time.

The birdhouse to be auctioned for Project Return. I knit and felted it, added the "snow" and my friend Terri (who owns The Needlework Shoppe in Westport) did the silk ribbon embroidery

Didn't Terri do such a nice job on the flowers?

I love it...and I hope someone nice buys it. No whining trolls allowed :)

Go here but only if you have a strong bug stomach.

Here is the beginning of the list!

Annie got the KOIGU KPPPM
Keri got the Mission Falls
MOM(aka Susie G.) got the Fixation and Bearfoot
Susan got the Noro Silk Garden
Amy Artisan got the Kersti, Pink Frog Tree and the Purple Matchmaker
Julia got the Noro Kureyon
Laurie got the Purple Frog Tree
Jennie got the Jamaica and Sock it to me

I am feeling so guilty about some of this :( But I only got what I got. There is more...and it is coming to this blog near you. I really, really, really would love to give each and every one of you exactly what you wanted, but alas, my stash is only so big.

Please email me at this address with if I have gotten you a solid price or not. Thanks!

Here's my response to this post. And now I am done. Don't talk to me, about me, for me or anything. As I have said before, there is only so much bitching and moaning a person can take! You are not willing to change anything about yourself to make anything better. You would rather have people pity you than take responsibility for you part in things. By the way, being supportive is not agreeing all the time, it is also pointing out things that could be worked on. If I am a bad person because I call you on it...well so be. Go cry to Mommy and run her into the poor house because you can't be a BIG GIRL and get a job. Constructive criticism is not agreeing with you.
Shut up, stop whining and get a real life!


ETA:
Lori says the following:

Thanks to Laura and everyone else who has given me their support and
advice. I truely appreciate it because I know that when you tell me there is
something I need to change it is because you truely want to help and not
just
bash me to make yourselves feel better.

I think it is funny that you are so self centered that you think that other people feel better by "bashing" you. I don't need to bash anyone to make myself feel better. I also really don't need anyone telling me whether or not I am a good person, mother, etc. I don't talk to my mother because she acts the exact same way you do.

K, now we need to get back to the whole I'm selling my stash for charity thing...

So, here it goes... I am sorting some of the emails, so please be ever so patient with me (the baby is mobile, ya know) You can ask me questions and I promise to be as detailed and prompt as i can! If you don't want any yarn, but would like to make a donation to the Group Home, you can do so here (they take paypal) Oh yeah, I take paypal too! Please stay tuned, as I will be heading for the books! And thanks again for all of the support you are showing!




That's more Noro Kureyon $10 for all 4 and if you want to add the other contact me!


Jaeger Matchmaker Merino 4 ply $10 for all 4


Misti Alpaca Lace $4


8 skeins of Debbie Bliss Baby Cashmerino~ I paid $68, how about $30

Rowan Big Wool $5

Frog Tree Alpaca cost $18 willing to sell for $9

Noro Kureyon Color 90 $5

Koigu Kersti bought for $11 each, sell all 3 for $11 (There's a pattern for fingerless mitts in LMKG)

LB Wool Ease... I got 4 different kinds here $10 for the whole lot?

see above

see above

Wanna add it to the ones above add $1

Paton's Canadiana (I think this was one of my first yarn purchases) $1

please add me to the above wool ease!

Hello there! Thanks for stopping by. Please note all proceeds will be going to Charity! And there will be more! This is all I could keep my attention attached to at the moment!



Cascade Fixation... $2.50 each or $15 for all

Bernat Soft Boucle ... $5 for all 5

KOIGU... paid $33 willing to let it go for $15 (I have 3 persons behind a Scissor Squadder~ Annie?)

Noro Silk Garden pd $11 each willing to let go for $10 both

I bought this to make Wendy at Knit and Tonic's Girlfriend tank. How's about $10 for the 2 (cost about $30)

The original Mission Falls Cotton... $5 for all three?
Special Thanks to Keri for donating an additional $15 to my charity!
More Mission Falls... how about $10 for all?

I have no idea where or when I got this...just that you can have all 3 for $5

Here's Gracie... So I want you all to know that any of the money collected before Friday will be donated to the Group Home I was in when I was a teenager. So not only do I get a more organized stash I get to give back to a place that has and continues to do so much for me! Thanks in advance for your help. Please email me at knittinpal@gmail.com

While I thought I was being nice by not involving this situation on my blog or leaving her comments... I must be wrong.

ETA: you can follow the drama on her husband's blog here. Oh and I sent another email that she won't reply to, but would rather play attack in blog comments.

So Let's set the record straight.

I have been friendly with her since last year, as my eldest was in the same class as her middle. Now as I have said over and over again... her situation sucks, but take accountibility for the choices you make. And be kind to the family members that help you ALL THE TIME. Jenny, you are my hero, because you are telling her what she needs to hear. But she is so far in denial that she can't.

Last year, I asked her if she would like to make some money by watching my kids while Mr. Clean and I went to a convention and then to Cabo San Lucas (mind you, we never go anywhere...ANYWHERE alone!) So, it gets closer and closer and no word...finally I ask her how much she wants for the week. She said she would call me back, not only did she not call me back about this...she has the audacity to ask me if she could be my Nanny. Now to me this is looking for the easy way out.

I am very punctual, she is not. I ordered Girl Scout Cookies from her and she got them in the BEGINNING of JANUARY and mentioned she needed the money the day before I was going to go to the Convention BY MYSELF! I told her that I didn't have time to meet up with her and she asked if Mr. Clean could write her a check. So I sent CASH in with the eldest.

Now, while I will admit to avoiding her calls, (I can get a little snippy when I am angry) she still should have sent the cookies in with the eldest. The excuse is something about Christmas presents, etc. We don't need Christmas presents... we want the cookies I PAID FOR>>>back in JANUARY!!!!

Last week I sent an email to her in response to a comment she left on my blog...it made mention of the things that have been bugging me. NO RESPONSE.

Now my comments are being deleted from her blog...classy.

So here you go... the email I sent to her:

Hi Lori,
I am sure that you think that “Jenny” is me, but it is not. Not that I don’t agree with some of her points. I haven’t spoken to you, because I do not wish to hurt your feelings. And while the quote on my blog was a hidden “jab” of sorts, your response just shows me how much denial you are in. I will make my points below:
1. While it can be agreed that Kevin is an asshole, you do need to take responsibility for marrying him again.
2. You were happy at first that Social Services was going to help with counseling, etc. Until it became too big a burden on you. (I thought that you were most concerned about your children)
3. I spoke to you about my concerns and tried to do so in a manner that wouldn’t upset you too much. And instead of being upset about an important part of our conversation, you were mad about me telling you that you feed your children too much junk food. I was flabbergasted.
4. You do live above your monetary means. This is the 21st Century, One of your children is old enough to watch the others, and you really need to get a job. I felt really awkward when you asked if you could be my Nanny when you wouldn’t even get back to me about how much money you wanted for the week we were going away. And the closer the time came to go, the more uncomfortable we both became about leaving the children with you. As far as worrying about an employer, you should be worrying about yourself and as I have mentioned before, Stew Leonard’s has a program for Mothers with children in school. Maybe you are above working in Stew’s.
5. Your children do know way too much and I have told you that before. And I think that you do need to sit down with them and cut back on things such as the movies, cheerleading, etc. My kids don’t do all that stuff and they are fine.
6. If you keep taking money from your parents, then you are showing your children that when they are adults, it’s okay to get Mom to pay for my mistakes.
7. Get a divorce, your children are learning that you should stay married to an idiot so that you can take his money.
8. People aren’t easily changed and I understand if you get mad at me for this email, but as I have been saying for a while, yeah he’s a jerk, but at some point you need to lace up those boots, suck it up and do something about it. It will be hard at first, but if you put all of the effort into it that you have been putting into finding an “easy way” you would be halfway there by now.

I am sorry if this email hurt you, but being true to the person I am, I can’t leave you wondering why I haven’t talked to you. Also, I paid you for the Girl Scout Cookies in January by sending in the cash with Dylana. I would like you to send the cookies home with Dylana, please.

Christine

PS. Just for your information, Harold doesn’t give me money, nor do I ask him for money. You asked me at the last possible moment for the money for the Girl Scout Cookies and I found a way to get the money to you. Yes, I got mad over that. I was pressured enough having to go on a trip all by myself, to have someone pressure me more by being last minute about the whole thing. I am a very timely person and get flustered with added pressures.

So please excuse this...but I am sick of this crap

Thanks Annie, for making the purging of the stash go, oh so much easier!

Keep in tune for a stash sale right here on this here blog! I have to go take pictures and then post! Please note, this sale is not first come first serve, well sorta. Hat City Scissor Squaders get first dibs and most of them work, so I will let you know as soon as I can.

Off to take pictures!!!

Happy Spring everyone!

It is that time of year where I decide I need to organize my life...he he
So here's the game plan:
1. I have made myself a daily task list...no knitting or watching of the shows until all items are checked off.
2. I must clean out the old stash...(Annie~with no blog has offered to help, so please let me know when you have some time)
3. Stash Sale...coming to this blog in the very near future...be advised that Scissor Squad members have 1st dibs (I promised)
4. Finding all of that important paperwork that seems to disappear when most needed!
5. Clean the back room, or we'll never get an aupair!

Unfortunately, it doesn't look like a very warm day out here in the Northeast! We'll see though!